Page:The Green Bag (1889–1914), Volume 12.pdf/714

 Rh and raise a stone to his memory with this in scription : Here lies a Pleader who ne'er urged a plea; A Circuí ter who never took a fee. From Court to Court to serve his friends he'd go. And tho' a mute, a firm support bestow. Thro' thick and thin he'd surely keep his way, Carry his client safe and win the day! Our care is now to here support his fame, "Report " his merits and •' record '' his name. To tell the world a Pleader lies below Who by false steps or tricks ne'er made a foe. No petulant disputer he! Would say No contradictory word beyond a simple neigh. Once on his legs, a sure and safe support, He'd cam' jury, witnesses and Court. A JUSTICE of the Peace in Calaveras County, Cal., had a case that puzzled him not a little. An Indian had been arrested for breaking into a cabin and stealing a pair of breeches and was formally charged with burglary. The old jus tice took all the testimony down in writing, as he is required to do under the code, and, as it was conflicting in character, he was in a quan dary. Two or three witnesses had testified positively to the fact that the Indian had been in the im mediate vicinity on the day of the theft, others that they had seen the breeches in his posses sion, while several others swore just as positively that he was in a different part of the county when the crime was committed. After reading the evidence over carefully, the justice announced that he would take the case under advisement until the next day. When the time came for deciding the case the old justice took his seat at his desk, cleared his throat and announced : "The law makes it my duty to weigh the evi dence for or against the accused and to decide according to the most ponderous." The justice procured a pair of gold scales, and placing the written evidence against the ac cused in one pan and the evidence in his favor in the other, announced as the pan containing the incriminating testimony went down : "The weight of evidence is against the ac cused. He is held to answer before the Supe rior Court for the crime of burglary with bail fixed at $1.000."

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The superstitious Indian thought the scales were a contrivance for getting at the truth, and when they decided against him broke down and confessed. THE late Ambrose L. Jordan, once Attorney General of New York State, was a personifica tion of acrimony, and the late Daniel Lord was a lawyer of unexampled mildness, but could give on occasion the retort severe. To the jury Mr. Jordan observed : " When I found who my op ponent was to be in this case, I thought I was to meet a gentleman, but I am disappointed." In his reply, Mr. Lord said, '• When I entered into this defense I knew that I was not about to meet a gentleman, and consequently I am not disap pointed. SUPREME Court Justice James Roosevelt of New York city, an uncle of the Republican can didate for the Vice Presidency, had been at Cham bers much annoyed by motions and cross-motions, adjournments and arguments in a controversy between two quack doctors respecting the man ufacture of some pills; each claiming patent right to the pills. Counsellor Dyatt, an advo cate of learning and wit, in bringing a new mo tion humorously observed, " I do not wish to dose your Honor with these pills too often, but on this counter-affidavit I submit that my adversary is in contempt.'' "Let him," interrupted Judge Roosevelt, •• purge his contempt with these pills; and I per ceive by the label on the box that they influence the diet (Dyatt).'.' LEGALLY considered, Christmas reflects this sentiment.—Know all men (and women) by these presents. THE late Oakey Hall was once connected with an American paper in London. His aim here was to achieve a high name at the English bar. He was the son of an Englishman, he told me once, and therefore he was in English law an self. Englishman, He made whenever no success he chose because to declare he lived hirrjwholly in the past, and his mental inclinations were solely reminiscent. From the day of his mysterious disappearance from New York he lost the power to utilize his brain in any way that could earn him a living.