Page:The Green Bag (1889–1914), Volume 09.pdf/284

 A Modernized Myth in Court. Parish, was informed by Mrs. Parish that what he had just heard and seen was an ex pression of Mr. Parish's desire to give fifty dollars to the society, and that when an announcement was made under like circum stances to the rector of Grace Church, that Mr. Parish had intimated a wish to con tribute liberally to the " building fund," each of these gentlemen would naturally be inclined to take a favorable view of Mr. Parish's mental capacity. That in the prepa ration and execution of the two codicils this faculty of interpretation was very largely and liberally invoked — that Mrs. Parish would suggest to the testator any gift she desired, and if he nodded assent, very well, down it went into the codicil. If he shook his head, disscnlicntc, it was laid aside and brought up again, and so on, until he as sented. I remarked that Mr. O'Conor's narrative reminded me of the story of the " Professor of Signs." He inquired what the story was, and I then narrated the substance of the anecdote which will be found below. Mr. O'Conor said at its close, " That just fits our case. Where can I find it? " I told him that I had read it, when a boy, in "Chambers' Journal," and that it would be found in one of the volumes between 1836 and 1840.' On the argument of the case before the surrogate (5 vol. Parish Will Case, p. 461), Mr. O'Conor, after commenting on the inter pretative process above referred to, said, " My friend, Mr. Brady, will mention a good illus tration of this language of signs "; where upon James T. Brady read as follows : — "TWO WAYS OF TELLING A STORY."

"King James VI, on removing to London, was waited on by the Spanish ambassador, a man of erudition, but who had a crotchet in his head that every country should have a professor of signs to teach him and the like of him to understand one another. 1 Chambers' Edinburgh Journal for 1836, p. 88.

253

The ambassador was lamenting one day, before the king, this great desideratum throughout all Europe, when the king, who was a queerish sort of man, says to him : 'Why, I have a professor of signs in the northernmost college in my dominions, namely at Aberdeen; but it is a great way off, perhaps six hundred miles.' ' Were it ten thousand leagues off, I shall see him,' says the ambassador, ' and am determined to set out in two or three days.' The king saw he had committed himself, and writes, or causes to be written, to the University of Aberdeen, stating the case and desiring the professors to put him off in some way, or make the best of him. The ambassador ar rives, is received .with great solemnity, but soon began to inquire which of them had the honor to be professor of signs; and being told that the professor was absent and would re turn nobody could say when, says the am bassador, ' I will await his return though it were twelve months.' Seeing that this would not do, and that they had to entertain him at great expense all the while, they contrived a stratagem. There was one Geordy, a butcher, blind of one eye, a droll fellow, with much wit and roguery about him. He is got, told the story, and instructed to be a professor of signs, but not to speak on pain of death. Geordy undertakes it. The ambassador is now told that the professor of signs would be at home next day, at which he rejoiced greatly. Geordy is gowned, wigged, and placed in a chair of state in a room of the college, all the pro fessors and the ambassador being in the ad joining room. The ambassador is now shown into Geordy's room, and left to con verse with him as well as he could, the whole professors waiting the issue with fear and trembling. The ambassador holds up one of his fingers to Geordy; Geordy holds up two of his. The ambassador holds up three; Geordy clenches his fist and looks stern. The ambassador then takes an orange from his pocket, and holds it up;