Page:The Green Bag (1889–1914), Volume 06.pdf/633

 Rh

586

the son of Asos, aged about forty, of middle size, sallow complexion, cheerful countenance, long face, straight nose, with a scar upon the middle of his forehead, for 60 1 pieces of brass, etc."

FACETLffi. Mr. Jurydodger : "Your Honor, I feel that I am not fit to be a juryman." Judge : " You appear to me to be unusually intelligent, sir." Jurydodger : " But, your Honor, I can't make head or tail but of what those lawyers say." Judge : " Neither can I; take your seat in the jury-box." The question of wills has its humorous side, as witness the following instance. The members of a certain family, upon the death of their father, had gathered together to listen to the reading of his will. Several legacies were read out, and each recipient, as he was made aware of his good fortune, burst into tears and expressed a filial wish that his father might have lived to enjoy his fortune himself. Finally, there came this be quest : " I give to my eldest son Tom a shilling to buy him a rope to hang himself." Tom, not to be outdone in filial feeling by his brothers, sobbed out, " God grant that my poor father had lived to enjoy it himself."

A lawyer of L. had among his clients a Ger man farmer, a hard-working, plain, blunt man. Hearing he had lost his wife, the lawyer sought him out to express his sympathy. To his amaze ment the German replied, " But I am married again." "Is it possible, and only three weeks since you buried your wife." "Dat is so, mine friend, but she is as dead as she ever will be." — Life.

A learned counsel was pleading before Sir John Byles, the author of the work from which a quotation was made, and the book was held up. "Does the learned author give any authority for that statement?" inquired the Judge. " No, my Lord; I cannot find that he does." "Ah!"

replied Sir John, "Then do not trust him, I know him well."

William Symmes was a distinguished lawyer of Portland (Me.) some hundred years ago. The following amusing story is told of a scene between him and Judge Thacher. Mr. Symmes had made a motion to the court, which he was zealously arguing, notwithstanding frequent interruptions by the judge. Thacher at last became impatient, and said : " Mr. Symmes, you need not persist in arguing the point, for I am not a court of errors, and cannot give final judgment." "I know," replied Symmes, "that you can't give final judgment, but as to your not being a court of errors, I will not say."

Mr. C., a very learned lawyer, was trying a little action before a justice in S County, and had the advantage (?) of being the only lawyer in the case. The opposite side was wholly without any employed counsel. Mr. C. had a good case, evidently, and his version of the law was fortified by a decision of the Supreme Court of Arkansas " directly in point." The cause was progressing as usual, but the justice did not very readily accept Mr. C.'s idea of the law. To make the matter absolutely convincing to the justice, Mr. C. with great assurance read the opinion of the Supreme Court by Judge S., and concluded his argument with an abid ing faith in his case. The justice, however, did not entertain quite as high a regard for the opinion of the Supreme Court as inferior courts usually should, and was not to be taken down in his idea of the law, in which he seemed to have as great faith as Mr. C. did in his, and with a defiant air stated to Mr. C., arguendo, that the decision just read did not amount to any thing; that it was merely the opinion of the judge announcing it, and was no more than his opinion or that of any one else, and the result was disastrous to Mr. C.'s- case, and he was driven to the necessity of an appeal. The justice. assured Mr. C. that if he could produce any law to sustain his contention, he would gladly hear him, otherwise the case would have to be decided according to the view the justice had of the law, and it was so decided.