Page:The Green Bag (1889–1914), Volume 05.pdf/411

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LEGAL REMINISCENCES. BY L. E. CHITTENDEN. II.

IF I had not heard the following story told in open court by a Hebrew lawyer of eminence, I should not repeat it here; for I have too many friends of that persua sion whom I esteem too highly to be willing to cast any imputations upon their race. I have an impression that the Hebrews of the better class are not sensitive, and look upon some habits of their lower orders with a contempt which does not differ much from our own scorn for the jockeying, cheat ing, mean practices of some of our own Anglo-Saxon origin. It is too good a story to be lost through an unfounded fear that it may be taken as evidence of race preju dice in the writer. John S. Wise, the genial Virginian whose natural electricity has made him the New York counsel of our leading Electrical Cor poration, was counsel in an action between two Hebrews, in which the parties were intensely interested. After a long consul tation had been closed, his client as he supposed departed. But he soon returned, and opening the door wide enough to get his head inside, interrogated his counsel thus, — "Meester Vise! How vil dey schvare dot Isaac ven he is a veetness?" "Swear him? " replied the counsel. " In the usual way, I suppose, upon the Bible." "Dat's no good, Meester Vise. Ef you schvare dot Isaac on de Bible, he vil lie awful. You might just so veil schvare him on a pack of cards.'' "But how can we bind his conscience? Must we make him pull off the head of a cock like the Chinese, or swear him on a toad-fish like the New-Zealander?" "No, no! You must schvare him on the Talmud. Dot vill make Isaac tell de troot." "All right, we will swear him on the Tal

mud, then," said the counsel; and again the client departed. But not for long. -Again his face appeared through the door, this time with an anxious expression. "What now, Jacob? " asked his lawyer. "Meester Vise! Of ve make dot Isaac schvare on de Talmud, vill he make me schvare on de Talmud too?" "I think he would," replied his counsel. "What is sauce for the goose, you know. If I make him swear on the sacred book, I do not think I could object to your being sworn on the same book; do you?" "Dot ish bad! Dot ish very bad! " said Jacob; and he went away sorrowful. A third time he returned, and again he was asked what he wanted. "Meester Vise! " said Jacob, with delib eration, "I tink vc vill schvare dot Isaac on de Bible!" B. was one of the kindest-hearted old fellows at our bar. He could repeat Para dise Lost, or a play of Shakspeare from memory; but he had no head for business. He had a neighbor, a sheriff, with whom he was in constant litigation, who never had a process that he did not use it to annoy him. Once he attached a herd of cows, and actually starved them, so that some of them died and others sold for less than half their value. B. sued G. for negligence. When the trial came on, he wanted me to assist him. I did so, for I thought he was oppressed, though I never expected to see the color of his money. There was really no defence to the action; but as B. testified to the condition of the cows, G. determined to impeach him. It was a mean thing to do. He was an old man of seventy years. True, he would promise anything and never keep his promise,