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370 of thanks. Gentlemen, I beg of you to keep in mind that in addressing you on this painful, I may say inauspicious, occasion, I make a fool of myself by special request. You are earnestly requested to bear in mind that the story is not only true but painfully melancholy, and therefore refrain from interruptions, applause, hisses, and laughter."

To all of which the party agreed.

"It happened," continued McVeaigh, "at a time when a distinguished party of gentlemen was travelling in New England, and was 'all the rage' with the people. I was ordered by the managing editor of the paper on which I was then employed to report at an inland city on a certain day and at a certain hour, for the purpose of wiring specials concerning the reception and entertainment incidental to the celebration. You may be sure that I put in an appearance promptly at the place indicated, and was anxious to meet the great expectations of my employers.

"You will now permit me to remark that I very soon discovered that my knowledge of the habits, customs, and manners of the interior members of the profession was decidedly limited, and that I had not come among them at the proper time to improve upon it. The reason was obvious. 'The boys' were engaged in reporting the tour of greatness for their own papers, and, as the saying goes, were turning an honest penny by sending special despatches to the metropolitan journals. Under these circumstances they very naturally looked upon poor me as an interloper; as a non-resident; a man who could not exhibit a tax-bill with the receipt of the collector of their borough upon it, or something of that sort, who had no moral or legal right on their territory. They were therefore cold, distant, formal, and reserved. They were not disposed to give away any facts or particulars; neither were they inclined to mention the names of any of the prominent local personages who figured conspicuously in the events which were transpiring.

"Gentlemen, I took in the situation without being prompted, and made up my mind intuitively that unless I kept my wits about me I should get into serious trouble. You observe that I had a presentiment.

"The first annoyance I experienced came from an unexpected source—the police department. Everywhere I went I found an officious guardian of the peace and dignity of the state at my elbow, and at every place where I sought admission to public assemblage, hall, or hotel, this man in uniform remarked, 'No admission, young man.'

"His attention grew monotonous, and I got terribly out of patience with him. In fact, he worried me till I could have done something desperate. However, I controlled my feelings, and, unless I am greatly mistaken, was as mild and polite as a boarding-school Miss. I said to him,—

My dear sir, your intrusion upon me is unwarrantable. I am not, as you evidently suppose, a pickpocket, I am a member of the press party.'