Page:The Gentle Grafter (1908).djvu/37

 “‘Mr. Fiddle,’ says I, ‘raise the window shade a bit, will you?’

“‘Biddle,’ says the young man. ‘Do you feel like you could eat some ham and eggs, Uncle James?’

“‘Mr. Mayor,’ says I, after laying my ear to his right shoulder blade and listening, ‘you’ve got a bad attack of super-inflammation of the right clavicle of the harpsichord!’

“‘Good Lord!’ says he, with a groan, ‘Can’t you rub something on it, or set it or anything?”

“I picks up my hat and starts for the door.

“‘You ain’t going, doc?’ says the Mayor with a howl. ‘You ain’t going away and leave me to die with this—superfluity of the clapboards, are you?’

“‘Common humanity, Dr. Whoa-ha,’ says Mr. Biddle, ‘ought to prevent your deserting a fellow human in distress.’

“‘Dr. Waugh-hoo, when you get through plowing, says I. And then I walks back to the bed and throws back my long hair.

“‘Mr. Mayor,’ says I, ‘there is only one hope for you. Drugs will do you no good. But there is another power higher yet, although drugs are high enough,’ says I.

“‘And what is that?’ says he.

“‘Scientific demonstrations,’ says I. ‘The triumph 25