Page:The Devil's Kingdom.djvu/11

Rh Devil.—Come, come, no nonsense. You know very well, that I know you; and more than all that, are we not mutually interested in the miseries and diseases of mankind? Could you keep the wolf from your door if I were idle; if no diseases existed? [Imps put doctor, who gets affable, rubs his hands, feels better.] And is it not me and mine that have started your business of dosing and drugging? [Imps amuse themselves, go to madam, &c.] Had I not led poor Adam and Eve away from Nature's laws, and taught them to eat poisonous stuffs, you'd have no precious diseases to doctor! Yes, were it not for me, you and all your medical brethren would be compelled to go to work and earn your food in the sweat of your lazy brows. But doctor, to business, to business!

Dr. D.—Yes, yes, to business; you are the bravest and most industrious of fellows; I'll do as you bid me, now as ever!

Devil.—Good, good, O, most excellent doctor! See that superstitious fool of a woman over there! She has been lamenting for you for hours. Her infant is peevish, and I made her believe it was dying. She wants the little brat thoroughly medicated! I prepared her for a copious dosing; morevermoreover [sic], I persuaded her to muffle the little thing up so thoroughly that it could get no natural air, and you know from that moment, the seeds of disease were deeply planted in the delicate textures of our to be life long victim!

Dr. D.—Truly you are a cunning and efficient devil—

Devil.—Hut, tut, doctor, [Seriously.] do not libel me in that manner. I am a gentleman of ingenuity! Am I not?

Dr. D.—Undoubtedly you are all that, and more to boot; but what do you want me to do, that's special in this case? [Imps watch them sharply.]

Devil.—You sly dog, as if you needed tutorage at this late date. [Nudging him, both laugh, Imps joining.]

Dr. D.—I have plenty of all kinds of medicines in my saddle bags, [Pointing to them.] and I warrant, I'll be equal to the constitution of both infant and mother! Ha! ha! ha! [Imps laugh and dance.]

Devil.—Yes, dear doctor, she greatly believes in our method of cure, ha! ha! ha! cure her child with mineral balm, it rots most effectually the solid, the bony structures, after which, Nature's hold upon that body and mind is trifling! Bah! nature is vulgar, but art is fine! Oh! doctor, we are the scientists, who can pluck out the rooted sorrow of the nations, and plant within the tablet of memory, a lasting monument to the infernal regions. In this manner, we succeed in being popular; have plenty of disciples, are respected, lauded"and courted as the monarchs of all we survey! Be true to your pocket, and you'll be true to me and to yourself! Sacrifice truth, nature, principle, man, or anything else, for our kingdom! We never fail in any circle of society when we labor slyly and industriously; and it is unwise to let everybody know our little secrets.

Dr. D.—Oh! but you are a genuine philosopher!

Devil.—And doctor, you are a cunning practitioner; you and I