Page:Swedenborg, Harbinger of the New Age of the Christian Church.djvu/159

 woke up; I thought that all was past and gone, and that I had been either forsaken or exiled. About morning it seemed to me as if I were riding, and as if I had had the direction pointed out. It was however dark, and when I looked I found that I had gone astray on account of the darkness; but then it brightened up and I saw how I had gone wrong, and I noticed the way and the forests and groves which I was to go through, and also heaven behind them, and then I awoke. My thoughts then of their own accord turned upon this, and afterward on the other life, and it seemed to me as if everything was full of grace. I burst into tears at having not loved, but rather provoked, Him who had led me and pointed out the way to the kingdom of grace; and also at my being unworthy of acceptance by grace."

"Easter was on the 5th of April, when I went to the Lord's table. Temptation still continued, most in the afternoon, till six o'clock; but it assumed no definite form. It was an anxiety felt at being condemned and in hell; but in this feeling the hope given by the Holy Spirit—according to Paul's epistle to the Romans, v. 5—remained strong. . I was assured that my sins