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came over her face what was it? was it satisfaction? she didn’t mind? was it pleasure? then I can hope?

[Then miserably]

Hope for what? what do I want? If Nina were free, what would I do? would I do anything? would I wish to? what would I offer her? money? she could get that from others myself?

[Bitterly]

What a prize! my ugly body there’s nothing in me to attract her  my fame? God, what a shoddy, pitiful! but I might have done something big I might still  if I had the courage to write the truth  but I was born afraid  afraid of myself  I’ve given my talent to making fools feel pleased with themselves in order that they’d feel pleased with me  and like me  I’m neither hated nor loved  I’m liked  women like me  Nina likes me!

[Resentfully]

She can’t help letting the truth escape her! “You’re an old dear, do you know it, Charlie?” Oh, yes, I know it too damned well! dear old Charlie!

[In anguish]

Dear old Rover, nice old doggie, we’ve had him for years, he’s so affectionate and faithful but he’s growing old, he’s getting cross, we’ll have to get rid of him soon!

[In a strange rage, threateningly]

But you won’t get rid of me so easily, Nina!

[Then confusedly and shamefacedly]

Good God, what’s the matter with me! since Mother’s death I’ve become a regular idiot!