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This is horrible! Sam thinks I’m finest fellow in world and I do this to him! as if he hadn’t enough! born under a curse! I finish him! a doctor! God damn it! I can see his end! never forgive myself! never forget! break me! ruin my career!

[More desperately]

Got to stop this! while there’s time! she said after lunch, talk  she meant, tell him  that means kill him  then she’ll marry me!

[Beginning to be angry]

By God, I won’t! she’ll find out! smiling! got me where she wants me! then be as cruel to me as she is to him! love me? liar! still loves Gordon! her body is a trap! I’m caught in it! she touches my hand, her eyes get in mine, I lose my will!

[Furiously]

By God, she can’t make a fool of me that way! I’ll go away some place! go to Europe! study! forget her in work! keep hidden until boat sails so she can’t reach me!

[He is in a state of strange elation by this time]

Go now! no! got to spike her guns with Sam! by God, I see! tell him about baby! that’ll stop her! when she knows I’ve told him that, she’ll see it’s hopeless! she’ll stick to him! poor Nina! I’m sorry! she does love me! hell! she’ll forget! she’ll have her child! she’ll be happy! and Sam’ll be happy!

[He suddenly turns to who has been staring at him, puzzledly—in a whisper]

Look here, Sam. I can’t stay to lunch. I haven’t time, I’ve got a million things to do. I’m sailing for Europe in a few days.