Page:Strange Interlude (1928).djvu/132

126

isn’t enough for him I can hear his mother saying, “Sammy’s got to feel sure you love him  to be happy.”  I must try to make him feel sure

[Speaking gently]

I want you to be happy, Sam.

[His face transformed with happiness]

I am—a hundred times more than I deserve!

[Presses his head down on her breast so he cannot see her eyes—gently]

Ssshh.

[Thinking sadly]

I promised her but I couldn’t see how hard it would be to let him love me  after his baby  was gone  it was hard even to keep on living  after that operation  Gordon’s spirit followed me from room to room  poor reproachful ghost!

[With bitter mockery]

Oh, Gordon, I’m afraid this is a deeper point of honor than any that was ever shot down in flames! what would your honor say now? “Stick to him! play the game!” oh, yes, I know  I’m sticking  but he isn’t happy  I’m trying to play the game  then why do I keep myself from him? but I was really sick for a time after  since then, I couldn’t  but  oh, I’ll try  I’ll try soon

[Tenderly—but having to force herself to say it]

Doesn’t my boy want to sleep with me again—sometime soon?