Page:Sons and Lovers, 1913, Lawrence.djvu/201

Rh Mrs. Dawes, but this did not occur to him. They were silent. There had come into his forehead a knitting of the brows which was becoming habitual with him, particularly when he was with Miriam. She longed to smooth it away, and she was afraid of it. It seemed the stamp of a man who was not her man in Paul Morel.

There were some crimson berries among the leaves in the bowl. He reached over and pulled out a bunch.

“If you put red berries in your hair,” he said, “why would you look like some witch or priestess, and never like a reveller?”

She laughed with a naked, painful sound.

“I don’t know,” she said.

His vigorous warm hands were playing excitedly with the berries.

“Why can’t you laugh?” he said. “You never laugh laughter. You only laugh when something is odd or incongruous, and then it almost seems to hurt you.”

She bowed her head as if he were scolding her.

“I wish you could laugh at me just for one minute—just for one minute. I feel as if it would set something free.”

“But”—and she looked up at him with eyes frightened and struggling—“I do laugh at you—I do.”

“Never! There’s always a kind of intensity. When you laugh I could always cry; it seems as if it shows up your suffering. Oh, you make me knit the brows of my very soul and cogitate.”

Slowly she shook her head despairingly.

“I’m sure I don’t want to,” she said.

“I’m so damned spiritual with you always!” he cried.

She remained silent, thinking, “Then why don’t you be otherwise.” But he saw her crouching, brooding figure, and it seemed to tear him in two.

“But, there, it’s autumn,” he said, “and everybody feels like a disembodied spirit then.”

There was still another silence. This peculiar sadness between them thrilled her soul. He seemed so beautiful with his eyes gone dark, and looking as if they were deep as the deepest well.

“You make me so spiritual!” he lamented. “And I don’t want to be spiritual.”

She took her finger from her mouth with a little pop, and looked up at him almost challenging. But still her soul was naked in her great dark eyes, and there was the same yearning appeal upon her. If he could have kissed her in abstract