Page:Selections from the writings of Kierkegaard.djvu/96

 94 University of Texas Bulletin

living a married life! My dear fellow-banqueters, ought we not, in default of a wedding present and congratula- tions, give each of the conjugal partners a demerit for re- peated inattentiveness ? It is taxing enough to express a single idea in one's life; but to think something so com- plicated as marriage and, consequently, bring it under one head; to think something so complicated and yet to do jus- tice to each and every element in it, and have everything present at the same time â€” verily, he is a great man who can accomplish all this! And still every Benedict accom- plishes it â€” so he does, no doubt ; for does he not say that he does it unconsciously? But if this is to be done uncon- sciously it must be through some higher form of uncon- sciousness permeating all one's reflective powers. But not a word is said about this! And to ask any married man about it means just wasting one's time.

He who has once committed a piece of folly will con- stantly be pursued by its consequences. In the case of mar- riage the folly consists in one's having gotten into a mess, and the punishment, in recognizing, when it is too late, what one has done. So you will find that the married man, now, becomes chesty, with a bit of pathos, thinking he has done something remarkable in having entered wedlock ; now, puts his tail between his legs in dejection; then again, praises marriage in sheer self-defense. But as to a thought-unit which might serve to hold together the disjecta membra*^ of the most heterogeneous conceptions of life contained in marriage â€” for that we shall wait in vain.

Therefore, to be a mere Benedict is humbug, and to be a seducer is humbug, and to wish to experiment with woman for the sake of "the joke" is also humbug. In fact, the two last mentioned methods will be seen to involve concessions to woman on the part of man quite as large as those found in marriage. The seducer wishes to rise in his own estima- tion by deceiving her; but this very fact that he deceives and wishes to deceive â€” that he cares to deceive, is also a demonstration of his dependence on woman. And the same

^â€¢â– 'Scattered members.