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 Barber——— "Here goes I, Wattie Dron”———Landlord ——— "I say, Bob, run for his wife, for this can't be put up with———gentlemen, the man is evidently deranged, and I hope you will not let my house be injured in any way by this business. “Here goes———" ———(wife pushing in)——— "Oh! Wattie, Wattie, what's this that's come ower ye? Do you no ken your ain wife?" Barber——— "Here goes I,”——— Wife———(weeping)——— "Oh! Wattie, if ye care na for me, mind your bairns at hame, and come awa' wi' me." Barber——— "Here goes I, Wat———" The affilicted wife now clasped her husband round the neck, and hung on him so as effectually to arrest his farther progress. Much did poor Wattie struggle to shake off his loving, yet unwelcome spouse, but it was now no "go"———his galloping was at an end. “Confound you for an idiot,” he bitterly exclaimed, "I never could win a guinea so easily in It is only necessary to add, that the ex- planation which immediately followed, was much more satisfactory to mine host than to the barber's better half; and that the clergyman restored Wattie to his usual good humour, by generously rewarding his exertions with the well-earned guinea.

It would be thought a hard government that should tax its people one-tenth part of their time, to be employed in its service; but idleness taxes many of as much more: sloth, by bringing on diseases, absolutely shortens life. "Sloth like rust, consumes faster than labours wears, while the used key is always bright," as Poor Richard says. But, dost thou love life, then do not squander time, for that