Page:Scots piper's queries , or, John Falkirk's caraches.pdf/6

 A. His knees.

Q. What is the coldest part of a woman?

A. The back part of her body.

Q. What's the reason that these three parts of men women and dogs are coldest?

A. Fabulous historians say, that there was thrice little holes broke in Noah's ark, and that the dog put his nose in one, and another the man put his knee in it, a third and biggest hole broke, and the woman hang'd her backside into it; and these parts being exposed to the cold blast make them always cold ever since.

Q. And what remedy does the man take for the warming of his cold knees?

A. He holds them towards the fire and when in bed draws his shirt down over them.

Q. And what does the woman do to warm her cold parts?

A. The married women turns their backside about to the goodmans belly: virgins, and those going mad for marriage, the heat of their maiden-head keeps them warm old matrons, whirl'd o'er maiden, widows, and widows bewitch'd hold up their cold parts to the fire.

Q. And what remedy does the poor dog take for his cold nose.

A Stops it below his tail the hottest bit in his body.

Q. What is the reason that dogs are worse on chapmen, than on other strange people.