Page:Robert Carter- his life and work. 1807-1889 (IA robertcarterhis00coch).pdf/35

Rh feet, and waving his sword above his head. “Behold a miracle!”

The generals standing by stepped forward, and examined the sword. “Please your Majesty, it is a fact. The sword is indeed a wooden one.”

The king was laughing in his sleeve, and with difficulty controlled himself sufficiently to order the release of the prisoner. Then he said to the soldier, “You are colonel of such a regiment,” adding in a whisper, “but ye maunna pawn your sword at Meggie’s again.”

The other story was called “Geordie and the Ambassador.”

When James the Sixth of Scotland came to the throne of England as James the First of that country, ambassadors came from all kingdoms of the Continent to congratulate him on his accession. Among the rest was the Spanish ambassador. One day he was talking with the king, who was a bit of a pedant, about the institutions of learning. He said, “There is one desideratum in our colleges which has never been attained. It is a professorship to teach dumb signs, so that when a Frenchman and a Spaniard and an Englishman come together they may make themselves understood by each other without difficulty.”

Said the boastful king, “I have such a professorship. It is in the most northerly college in my dominions, at Aberdeen.”

“I would gladly travel far to see such a wonder,” said the ambassador. “I shall go to Aberdeen.”

The embarrassed king wrote to the professors at Aberdeen that he was in a scrape, and they must get him out as best they could. When the ambassador arrived at Aberdeen, he was informed that the professor of dumb signs was from home for six weeks. “I am