Page:Records of the Life of the Rev. John Murray.djvu/86

76 impressive nature. I looked around for my companion of the past evening, but I saw him not; and I was pained by the disappointment. On my departing from the tabernacle, however, he again took my hand, assuring me, he was glad to see me, and repeating a verse of a hymn: "We shall not always make our moan," &c. &c. which hymn, I had often sang, and of which I was very fond. I melted into tears; this man appeared to me, as an angel of God, and most devoutly did I bless the Father of my spirit, for sending me such a comforter. I was in haste to unbosom myself to him, to make him acquainted with the extent of my errors; but this was a subject, upon which he did not seem in haste to hear me. He, however, urged me to draw consolation from the promises of our God, which he pronounced all yea, and amen, in the Redeemer: He also expressed a wish to meet me, at the table of the Lord, upon the following Sunday; for this, my own heart ardently panted, and I engaged, if possible, to obtain a ticket of admittance. My concern for my very reprehensible aberrations, as they affected my spiritual interest, so completely occupied my mind, that I had little leisure for reflection upon my pecuniary embarrassments, yet my circumstances were truly deplorable. I was in debt, without the means of making payment, nor had I any prospect of future support. I disdained to ask charity, and the business, of which I had obtained a superficial knowledge in Ireland, was not encouraged in London. The friend, whom I first saw at the tabernacle, had continued a vigilant observer of my conduct; he had frequently visited me, and my eyes convinced him I was no longer the gay, inconsiderate wanderer, but truly a man of sorrow. Compassionating my sufferings, he invited me to his pleasant home, and, in a voice of friendship, requested I would pour into his bosom all my griefs. I did so, and his resolution was instantly taken. To my great consolation, he engaged to procure me, immediately, another lodging, to make my present landlord easy, and to procure for me, if I was willing, the means of future support; and this, without rendering me dependent, except upon my own regular efforts, and the Being, who had called me into existence. Let the feeling heart judge of the indescribable transports, which this conversation originated in my soul. Gratitude swelled in my bosom; I experienced all its sweet enthusiasm; and hardly could I control my impatience, for the execution of a plan, in every view so desirable. The lodging was immediately obtained; it was at the house of an old lady, in Bishopgate's street, where was appropriated solely to my use, a neat, and well furnished apartment. The succeeding morning, this benevolent