Page:Records of the Life of the Rev. John Murray.djvu/29

Rh general advice next ensued, a second hymn was sung, and the whole concluded with prayer. This was a most delightful season, both for my parents, and myself. I became the object of general attention, my society was sought by the grey-headed man, and the child. My experience was various, and great; in fact, I had experienced more of what is denominated the work of God upon the heart, than many, I had almost said than any, of my seniors, my parents excepted. Devout persons pronounced that I was, by divine favour, destined to become a burning, and a shining light; and from these flattering appearances my father drew much consolation. I was frequently addressed, in his presence, as the child of much watching, and earnest prayer; this, to my proudly pious parent was not a little flattering; it was then that I derived incalculable satisfaction, from these very legible marks of election: And though the Methodists insisted, that the doctrine of election, before repentance and faith, was a damnable doctrine; yet they admitted, that, after the manifestation of extraordinary evidences, the individual, so favoured, was unquestionably elected. Thus by the concurrent testimonies of Calvinists, and Arminians, I was taught to consider myself as distinguished, and chosen of God; as certainly born again. Yet, as it was next to impossible to ascertain the moment of my new birth, I became seriously unhappy, but from this unhappiness I was rescued, by reading accounts of holy and good men in similar circumstances; I now therefore lived a heaven upon earth, beloved, caressed, and admired. No longer shut up under my father's watchful care, I was allowed to go out every morning at five o'clock to the house of public worship; there I hymned the praises of my God, and united in fervent prayer with the children of the faithful; meeting several of my young admiring friends, we exchanged experiences, we mingled our joys and our sorrows, and, by this friendly intercourse, the first was increased, and the second diminished. In all our little meetings we were continually complaining to, and soothing each other, and these employments were truly delightful. The mind cannot be intently occupied on contrary matters at the same time, and my mind being filled with devotion, my waking and my sleeping moments were invariably engaged in religious pursuits; it was in truth my meat, and my drink, to do what I believed the will of my heavenly Father. At this period, I should have been wrecked upon the sand-built foundation of self-righteousness, as many of my young friends were, had it not been for the unbroken vigilance of an experienced and tender father. He saw the danger of too great