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Rh From this period my position altered. Maria Ivanovna scarcely spoke to me, and tried to avoid me in every manner. The commandant's house became unendurable. Gradually, I accustomed myself to remain at home alone. Vassilissa Yegorovna reproached me for this, at first, but finding me obstinate, she left me in peace. I only saw Ivan Kouzmitch when on duty; Shvabrine I met seldom and reluctantly, the more so because I noticed his hidden dislike to me, which helped to confirm my suspicions. My existence became insupportable. I lapsed into a gloomy state of melancholy, fostered by my loneliness and inaction. This solitude intensified my love, which hourly became more burdensome to me. I lost all desire for reading and literature. My spirits sank. I feared lest I should either lose my reason, or abandon myself to dissolute habits. Unexpected events, which largely influenced my subsequent career, agitated my very soul violently and beneficially.

entering on the account of the singular events