Page:Psychopathia Sexualis (tr. Chaddock, 1892).djvu/270

252 With respect of himself, the patient asserts that, when four years old, he dreamed of handsome jockeys wearing shining boots. Too, he never dreamed of women when he grew older. His nightly pollutions were always induced by “boot-dreams.” From his fourth year he had a peculiar partiality for men, or, more correctly, for lackeys wearing shining boots. At first they only excited his interest, but, with development of his sexual functions, the sight of them caused powerful erections and lustful pleasure. It was only servants’ boots that affected him; the same kind of boots on persons of like social station were without effect on him. In a homo-sexual sense, there was no sexual impulse connected with these situations. Even the thought of such a possibility was disgusting to him. At times, however, he had sensually-colored ideas,—like being his servant’s servant, and drawing off his boots; but the idea of being stepped on by him, or of having to blacken his boots, was most pleasing. The pride of the aristocrat rose up against such thoughts. In general, these notions about boots were disgusting and painful to him.

Sexual instinct was early and powerfully developed. It first found expression in indulgence in sensual thoughts about boots, and, after puberty, in dreams accompanied by pollutions; otherwise, the mental and physical development was undisturbed. Patient was well endowed mentally—learned easily, finished his studies, and became an officer. On account of his distinguished, manly appearance and his high position, he was much sought in society.

He characterizes himself as a clever, quiet, strong-willed, but superficial man. He asserts that he is a passionate hunter and rider, and that he has never had any inclination for feminine pursuits. In the society of ladies he has always been reserved; dancing always tired him. He had never had any interest in a lady of high social position. As for women, only the buxom peasant girls, such as are the models of painters in Rome, had interested him. He had, however, never felt any sexual interest in such representatives of the female sex. In the theatre and circus only male performers had excited his interest; but, at the same time, they had caused him no sensual feelings. As for men, only their boots excited him, and, indeed, only when the wearers belonged to the servant class and were handsome men. Men of his own position, wearing never so fine boots, were absolutely indifferent to him.

With reference to his sexual inclinations, the patient is still uncertain whether he feels more inclination toward the opposite sex or toward his own sex. He is inclined to think that originally he had more inclination for women, but that this sympathy was, in any case, very weak. He states with certainty that the sight of a naked man made no impression on him, and that the sight of male genitals was even repugnant to him. In the case of women, this was not exactly the case, but he was not excited sexually even by the most beautiful feminine form. When a