Page:Pieces People Ask For.djvu/220

102 Cries the showman, "Turn 'em out!
 * Dim the lights! there, that will do;

Come again to-morrow, boys;
 * Bring your little sister, too."

Exit mother, half distraught,
 * Exit father, muttering "Bore!"

Exit children blubbering still,
 * "Want to see the monkeys more!"

J. Honeywell.

would I do if you was dead?
 * And when do you think of dying?

I'd stand by your bed, and hold your head,
 * And cry, or pretind to be crying!

There's many a worser man nor you—
 * If one knew where to find him—

And mebbe many a better, too,
 * With money to leave behind him!

But you, if I was dying to-day,
 * (I saw you now when you kissed her!)

I tell you, Pat, what you'd be at—
 * You'd marry your widdy's sister!

You'd make an illigant corpse, indade,
 * Sleeping so sound and stiddy;

If you could see yourself as you laid,
 * You'd want to come back to Biddy!

You would be dressed in your Sunday best,
 * As tidy as I could make you,

With a sprig of something on your breast,
 * And the boys would come to wake you.

But you, if I was dead in your stead,
 * (Do you think I never missed her?)

I tell you, Pat, what you'd be at—
 * You'd marry your widdy's sister!

The undertaker would drive the hearse
 * That has the big black feather;

If there was no money left in your purse,
 * Your friends would club together.