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round him on every side, to discover the object of his indignation; at last he found that it               came from a parrot, perched in a balcony with- in his reach. But the generous Scot, disdain- ing to stain his trusty blade with such ignoble blood, put up his sword again, with a sour smile, saying, 'Gin ye were a man as ye're a green geuse, I would split your weem.'

39. Sir Toby Butler, the famed Irish bar- rister, once invited Sir Charles Coote to dinner; he knew that his guest valued himself on a long list of ancestry, in which Sir Toby could have rivalled him if he had not prized himself on his own merit. At dinner Sir Toby used to cry out, 'Tell my cousin Pat the butler, tell my               cousin Oonah the cook, tell my cousin Terry the groom, such and such a thing.' 'What,' said Sir Charles, in a degree of surprise, 'I find that all your servants are your relations.' 'To be               sure,' said the knight: 'is it not more praise worthy to retain my own relations for ser- vants, than to keep your's!'

F I N I S.