Page:Odds and ends, or, A groat's-worth of fun for a penny (2).pdf/14

14 rest, the grand object would not eventually be ac- complished. Pitcalnie bethought him to assume the name of the deacon, to enter the house of the candidate, call for what entertainment he pleased. and, finally, as Sir Lawrence was confined to bed with gout, to go away without being discovered. No sooner had he settled the plan in his own mind than he proceeded to put it in execution. Reer- ing up to the door he rung the bell with all the insolent violence which might have been expected from so consequential a person as the individual he wished to personate, and presently down came à half-dressed lacquey, breathing curses, not loud but deep, against the cause of this unseasonable annoy- ance "Tell your master,' said Pitcalnie, 'that Deacon-- (mentioning the name of the impor- tant clcctor, wishes to see him.' When the man went up, and told Sir Lawrence that Deacon -had come drunk to the door, wishing to sec him, the heart of the old gentleman leapt within him, and he instantly sent down his compliments to his respected visitor, begging him to excuse his non-appearance, which was only owing to extre- mity of illness, but entreating that he would enter, and in every respect use the house as his own. Pitcalnie grunted out an assent to the last part of the message, and, being shown into a room, began to call lustily about him. In the first place he ordered a specimen of Sir Lawrence's port, next of his sherry, then of his claret, and lastly of his champagne. When he had drunk as much as he could, and given a most unconscionable degree of trouble to the whole household, he staggered off, leaving it to Sir Lawrence to come, next day, to the best explanation he could with the deacon. If Britannia rules the waves,' said a qualmish