Page:Newspaper writing and editing.djvu/225



2. In rewriting this story, summarize the essential facts in the opening sentence.

When a Third avenue elevated train reached the 166th street station late yesterday afternoon the guards announced that the next stop would be 177th street, the intervening stations being skipped.

At once there was a rush for the platform, which was already full of people, and by the time the train was ready to go on, men and women were jammed tight against the cars. The conductor was warned not to start the train, but he pulled the bell and the moving cars rolled the front row of those on the platform along with it. Six panes of glass were broken and fully a dozen persons cut or bruised.

Six men who had been injured went to the Morrisania police station and made a complaint. They were R. Nothstein, a clerk of 451 East 171st street; Frank Schwartz, a mechanic living at 415 East 176th street; John Hurley, an engineer of 5415 Third avenue; William Balk, a clerk of 3661 Third avenue, Charles Wold, of 1695 Franklin avenue; and Thomas O'Brien of 341 West 167th street.

The police set out to find the conductor who started the train, but as none of the complainants had taken his number, they were still hunting for him last night.

3. Improve the lead of the following story by playing up a better feature.

Interstate Commerce Commissioner Clark, in a statement issued today in connection with the numerous wrecks on railroads in the United States, said that conditions are deplorable.

"Most of the wrecks," he said, "may be put in the class of avoidable accidents. Poor rails, speed craze, and human negligence are the causes."

Mr. Clark declared that the commission is powerless to prescribe adequate regulations to prevent wrecks, and that, though its recommendations have been generally observed, they cannot be enforced. He intimated that Congress should give the commission more power to compel railroads to observe safety rules which are deemed necessary from the commission's many investigations.

4. Give this story an entirely different lead without beginning with a summary.

Julius R. Wein literally sang himself into matrimony, and then sang himself into a jail cell. The dulcet tones of his tenor voice won him a bride and also caused his arrest on a charge of forgery.