Page:My Life and Loves.djvu/369

Rh been talking nonsense! My father's face too appeared to be dreadfully perturbed while I was speaking.

"Could one think sanely and yet talk like a mad-man? What an appalling fate!" I resolved in that case to use my revolver on myself as soon as I knew that my state was hopeless: that thought gave me peace and I turned at once to compose myself. In a few minutes more I was fast asleep.

The next time I awoke, it was again night and again the Doctor was beside me and my sister: "Do you know me?" he asked again, and again I replied: "Of course I know you and Sis here as well."

"That's great", he cried joyously, "now you'll soon be well again."

"Of course I shall", I cried joyously, "I told you that before: but you seemed hurt; did I wander in my mind?"

"There, there", he cried, "don't excite yourself and you'll soon be well again!"

"Was it a near squeak!" I asked.

'You must know it was", he replied, "you took sixty grains of belladonna fasting and the books give at most quarter of a grain for a dose and declare one grain to be generally fatal. I shall never be able to brag of your case in the medical journals", he went on smiling, "for no one would ever believe that a heart could go on galloping far too fast to count, but certainly two hundred odd times a minute for thirty odd hours without bursting. You've been tested", he concluded, "as no one was ever tested before and have come back safe! But now sleep again", he said, "sleep is Nature's restorative."

Next morning I awoke rested but very weak: the Doctor came in and sponged me in warm water and changed my linen: my nightshirt and a great part of the sheet were quite brown. "Can you make