Page:Mrs Caudle's curtain lectures.djvu/186

 LECTURE XXVII.

HERE, it isn't often that I ask you to do anything for me, Mr. Caudle, goodness knows! and when I do, I'm always refused—of course. Oh yes! anybody but your own lawful wife. Every other husband aboard the boat could behave like a husband—but I was left to shift for myself. To be sure, that's nothing new; I always am. Every other man, worthy to be called a man, could smuggle a few things for his wife—but I might as well be alone in the world. Not one poor half-dozen of silk stockings could you put in your hat for me; and everybody else was rolled in lace, and I don't know what. Eh? What, Mr. Caudle?

"What do I want with silk stockings?

"Well—it's come to something now! There was a time, I believe, when I had a foot—yes, and an ankle, too; but when once a woman's married, she has nothing of the sort; of course. No: I'm not a cherub, Mr. Caudle; don't say that. I know very well what I am.