Page:Miseries of poor simple innocent silly Tam.pdf/2

 When John came to a man's estate, to the age of twenty one years, he tell’d his mither, he would hae a wife of some sort either young or auld, widow or lass if they had but head and hips, tongue and tail, he should tak them; and weel I was mither, quoth he, they'll get a lumping penny worth o' me, tak me wha will His mither tells him o' the black butcher on Tivot side, who had three dochters and every one of them had something there was Kate, Ann, and Girzy, had hunder merks the piece, Kate and Ann had baith bastards; Girzy, the eldest had a hump back, a high breast, bake legged, a short wry neck, thrawn mouth and goggle eyed, a perfect Æsop of the female kind, with as many crooked conditions within as without, a very lump o loun-like ill nature row'd a'together, as if she had been nine months in a haggis, a second edition of crooked backed Ri-chard, an old English King, that was born wi' teeth to bite a' round about him, and yet the wight gaed mad to be married, and told them about three kinds of drun-ken women that if he had ony thing ad with them they would be a mortifying downdraught on him as long as he live