Page:Mirror of wit.pdf/13

( 13 ) vehemence againſt the ill conſequence of giving the lie in converſation; and there one adviſing that when any man told a tale not conſiſtent with truth or probability, the hearer ſhould only cry Twang! which could not irritate people to paſſion, like calling it a lie. Afterwards he digreſſed into the ſtory of the miracle of five thouſand being fed with five loaves of bread &c. He told them that they were no ſuch loaves as thoſe uſed now-a-days. but were as big as m nntains.- At which the tar uttered with a loud voice. Twang! What! ſays the Quaker, doſt thou think the friend? No, ſays Jack, but I am thinking how big the oven was that baked them.

34. Go, ſaid a gentleman to his Iriſh ſervant, and bring the parcel I left at the ſign of the Frying-Pan. The ſervant returned, and ſaid he could not find out the ſign. The matter, enraged, deſired the ſervant to follow him and when they came to the houſe, he exclaimed, Have you eyes your head you ſtupid dolt! Yes Sir, ſaid Pat; you deſired me to call at the ſign of the Frying-Pan, but that is the Frying Pan itſelf which you point to.

35 A Sailor meeting with an old a ff ante who had become very best, aſked him where he lived?- Where I live, ſaid he, I don't know; but half-ſtarve at Wapping.

36. Two Engliſh officers, after a night's' lodging in the highlands of Scotland found their clothes infeſted with vermin. One of them was very buſy in taking off the ſloweſt kind, which the other obſerving, o ied out, Zoundsǃ what are you doing? Let us firſt ſecure the dragoons, we can take the foot a ſure.

37. A young country girl in Lombardy running after her ſhe-aſs, which was in talk get up to her o l;