Page:Memoirs of Margaret Fuller Ossoli (IA memoirsofmargare01fullrich).pdf/122

120 on any subject — to say so many things which do not seem called out, makes me feel strangely vague and movable.

’Tis true, the time is probably near when I must live, alone, to all intents and purposes,— separate entirely my acting from my thinking world, take care of my, ideas without aid, — except from the illustrious dead, — answer my own questions, correct my own feelings, and do all that hard work for myself. How tiresome ’tis to find out all one’s self-delusion! I thought myself so very independent, because I could conceal some feelings at will, and did not need the same excitement as other young characters did. And I am not independent, nor never shall be, while I can get anybody to minister to me. But I shall, go where there is never a spirit to come, if I call ever so loudly.

‘Perhaps I shall talk to you about Körner, but need not write. He charms me, and has become a fixed star in the heaven of my thought; but I understand all that he excites perfectly. I felt very new about Novalis, — “the good Novalis,” as you call him after Mr. Carlyle. He is, indeed, good, most enlightened, yet most pure; every link of his experience framed — no, beaten — from the tried gold.

‘I have read, thoroughly, only two of his pieces, “Die Lehrlinge zu Sais,” and “Heinrich von Ofterdingen.” From the former I have only brought away piecemeal impressions, but the plan and treatment of the latter, I believe, I understand. It describes the development of poetry in a mind; and with this several other developments are connected. I think I shall tell you all I know about it, some quiet time after your return, but