Page:Mad pranks of Tom Tram, son in law to Mother Winter.pdf/15

 N a winter night, coming home very late Tom Tram fell with his arms before him, and at the laſt run his noſe againſt a poſt; what, quoth Tom, is my noſe longer than my arms? And afterwards he dropped into a well that was in the yard, and crying out, help, help, all is not well that is in the well, the neighbours came and puled him out, and he dropp'd like a pig that had been roaſted on a ſpit; but he was then in a cold condition, ſo he went to bed, and covered himſelf; but before morning, having a looſeneſs in his belly, Tom had beſhit the ſheets; and when ſome, by the quick ſcent of their noſes, had diſcovered the fault, he told them, it was nothing but the clear mud of the well that came away from him; and if he died of that ſickneſs, he would be buried by torch-light, becauſe none ſhould ſee him go to his grave. Juſt as he had ſaid, in came a hot water man, of when he requeſted to give him a ſup; which having taſted, he feigned himſelf to be in a hot fever, and roſe up in his clothes, ran away with the aquvitæ man's bottle of hot water, and took his mother's trevot,