Page:Letters of Mlle. de Lespinasse.djvu/109

92 to me ; but hear this : he said that, judging by appearances, M. de G-. . . had obtained that which M. de M. . . had desired to obtain ; and then he added : " I am not afraid lest his piercing eyes should see these words ; I consent that those of M. de M . . . should read this letter as he reads your soul," etc. ; adding a hundred lively little jests very gay and clever ; he is certainly charming, but quite undeserving of being loved. — Mon ami, you advised me yesterday not to love you ; is it I or yourself whom you wish to save from that misfortune ? — tell me. I have an infallible remedy : how sweet it will be to me if I can think that I do anything for you.

Mon ami, this soul which is like a thermometer, now at freezing, then at temperate, and a moment after at the burning heat of the equator, this soul, thus carried away by an irresistible force, finds it hard to curb and calm itself; it longs for you, it fears you, it loves you, it wanders in a wilderness, but always it belongs to you and to its regrets.

1774.

Mon ami, yesterday, coming home at midnight, I found your letter. I did not expect such good luck ; but what grieves me is the number of days that must pass without my seeing you. Ah ! if you knew what the days are, what the life is, stripped of the interest and the pleasure of seeing you ! Mon ami, amusements, occupations, activity are all you need, but I, my happiness is you, and only you ; I would not wish to live if I could not see you, could not love you at every in- stant of my life. Send me news of yourself, and come and dine to-morrow with Comte C. . . He asked me to change from Sunday to Saturday; I said yes; but come there, I entreat you. I was to dine to-day at the Spanish ambassador's, but I have excused myself ; if you were to be there