Page:Laugh and grow fat, or, The comical budget of wit (2).pdf/22

22 stockings the wrong side outwards? Because, said he, there is a hole on the other side.

An Irishman in the late General Washington's army, being separated from his companions, was met by five Hessian soldiers, Pat seeing his danger, ordered them to surrender.—They, suspecting him to be backed by numbers, immediately obeyed. Pat shouldered their arms and marched them to the General's tent, when being asked how a single man durst encounter five. O by Jasus, my General, I surrounded them! Washington, who was seldom seen to smile, laughed heartily, and promoted him to a halbert.

As an Irish Officer, who was severely wounded at the battle of Waterloo, lay on the ground, a foreign soldier, who was near him, also wounded, made a terrible howling; when the officer exclaimed, D—n you sir, what do you make such a noise for, do you think there's nobody killed but yourself!

Once, at a meeting of ministers, a question of moment was started to be debated among them. Upon the first proposal of it, a confident young man shot his bolt presently. He said, Truly I hold it so. A grave minister answered, You hold, sir, it becomes you to hold your peace.

A minister asking a lady in the neighbourhood of Norwich, whether she knew any thing of Christ? was answered, Yes, sir, I remember that I once saw his picture.

Lady Huntington once asking a person if she