Page:Laugh and grow fat, or, The comical budget of wit (2).pdf/11

 Donald at last said, 'Weel, weel, Sir, since there be no help for it, Donald maun e'en forgi'e her, but,' turning to his two sons, "may G—d d—n you, Duncan and Rory, if you forgie her.'

A clergyman chose for his text the following words: "Which of you will go up with me to Ramoth-Gilead?" Then pausing, he again and again repeated the words; when a gallant tar started from his seat, and looking round him, with an eye of indignation, he exclaimed, "will none of you go with the worthy gentleman? As for my part, I go for one!"

The Laird of M'Nab was writing to one of his friends from an Edinburgh Coffee-house, when a gentleman of his acquaintance observed, that he was setting at defiance the laws of orthography and grammar. 'D—n your blood!' exclaimed the Highland chieftain, 'how can a man write grammar with a pen like this?'

A young woman of Dublin, apprehensive of some unhappy effects from an illicit amour, which she had for some time carried on with a Dutch sailor, mentioned her situation to a friend, who advised her to place her future offspring to her young master, as being the richer man of the two. 'I was thinking of that,' replied the fair one, but then you know the child will discover all when it begins to speak Dutch.'

About the year thretty-sax, a company differed, 'Whether it was better for a man to hae sons or doughters?' They cou'd na gree, but