Page:Joe Miller's jests (2).pdf/16

 16 Mr. Dryden once at dinner, being by a lady offered the rump of a fowl he refuſing it. the lady ſaid, Prav Mr Dryden take ii, the rump is the beſt part of the fowl. Yes Madam, ſaid he, and ſo I think it is of the fair. A factious teacher of arithmetic who had long been married without being able to get his wife with child; one ſaid to her, Ma- dam, your huſband is an excellent asithme- tician. Yes, replied ſhe, only he cannot multiply. A cowardly ſervant having been out a hunting with his maſter, they had killed a wild boar. The fellow thinking the boar ſtirred, betook himſelf to a tree; upon which his maſter called to him, and aſked him, What he was afraid of, as the boar's guts were out? No matter for that, ſaid he, his teeth are in.

A butcher Smithfield, who lay up- on his death bed, ſaid to his wife, My dear, I am not a man for this world,