Page:Jealous man convinced that he is no cuckold, or, The way of the world represented.pdf/8

( 8 ) you by day, and drudge for you by night, and yet you are not contented, without ſuperiority over me.

W. I know no drudgery you do for me by night, unleſs it be ſleeping, and that I can do myſelf.

H. Sure you won't diſgrace me before thoſe people, and tell them I neglect family duty, I am ſure I love my marriage bed, as well as any man.

W. Perhaps you do, but if you loved the bed leſs, and your wife more, then I am ſure I ſhould find an alteration, as you notic'd on your ſide

H. Dear Mrs. Critical, you want me to fulfil the proverb, to love you ſo well, as to rub you down with an oaken towel, as my neighbours do; or like the Muſcovite women, who don't think their huſbands love them, unleſs they thraſh them once or twice a week.

W. No more of your airs, if you love me. My meaning is to banish all jealouſy from you : for was it ſo, you'd better put your horns in your pocket, than expoſe them; you may reſt contented, and go to church with your neighbours, for it's more in faſhion now-a-days, than you are aware of. Yet I afure you, huſband, you are no cuckold.

H: Why indeed that's great ſatisfaction to me, I muſt needs own I have been to blame for harbouring ſuch an opinion of you, but I will do ſo no more. I will enjoy my pipe and my bottle hereafter, make my heart glad, my life eaſy and you and I ſhall join hand in hand together, and ſet a good example to all our neighbours.

W. Now my dear rejoice, that I've convinced you of your fooliſh thoughts of cuckoldom, which ſhall make our hearts eaſy And as you deſire we'll join our hands together, go home in love, live in peace, and enjoy ourſelves over a cup of good liquor, to cheer our ſpirits.

H. With all my heart, wife, ſo let the loving company ſubſcribe themſelves witneſs, if they pleaſe.