Page:Jealous man convinced that he is no cuckold, or, The way of the world represented.pdf/4

( 4 ) now, I'd ſain keep you ſo; for it is an old ſaying he that makes his wife a Goldfinch, in the end will find her a Water-wagtail. 'Tis good for a man to be cautious.

W. Out, you ſilly elf, I would not be a whore was there never a man in the world, I defy the devil and all his works.

H. Indeed my heart, I believe the firſt part of your ſtory, but my head does ache a little as well as my heart; I dread the horns, I would not be a cuckold for all the world, to be pointed at by every one to have a ſkimington rode for me, and a thouſand other reproaches which are unſufferable

W. Tuſh, fooliſhman, can I make you a cuckold of myſelf? and were it ſo, you ought to bear all afflictions with chriſtian patience; the old proverb tells you, that all cuckolds go to heaven. The world as bad as is is, will ſay 'tis none of your fault, but your wife's.

H. Indeed that is ſome ſatisfaction; yet as well as I love heaven I ſhould not like to be a cuckold.

W. Alas, my Pigſnies, I believe from all your diſcourſe hitherto, that you don't know what a cuckold is, nor whence the word is derived.

H. My dear duck, I know you are a greater ſcholar than I; and that you have more ſenſe and knowledge than all the women in the pariſh beſides, therefore I will tell you firſt, what I apprehend to be the meaning of it, and if I err, I ſhould be glad to be better informed by your greater wit and profound underſtanding.

W. Well, I will have patience till you are done, let's hear your ſkill in revealing this hidden myſtery.

H. My life, this is what I conceive of it, that there are three ſorts of cuckolds; the first is like a Stag, he carries horns, and is proud of them; the 2nd is like a Ram, he carries his horns backwards, and cannot ſee them' the 3d is like an Aſs, who going to a river to drink, ſees the ſhadow of his