Page:Jay Little - Maybe—Tomorrow.pdf/83

 girl, but now she wanted to be more than just another girl She wanted to be loved and loved and loved by Gaylord.

She stood by the window dreaming … it was moonlight on a lake again and a soft breeze blew across the waveless surface, caressing her cheeks. She was there in Robert Blake's arms … Robert Blake … how he reminded her of Gaylord now. Even with the added weight and deeper colored skin, he was like him. Alike? Oh … no. Gaylord had never taken her in his arms the way Blake did now. Had never whispered the words into her ear that Blake whispered. She closed her eyes and remembered Blake's kiss.

Blake had kissed her passionately, that first night on the lake, and after several dates she had allowed him to kiss her neck, almost down to her breasts. She remembered the emotions, the thrill when he had placed her hand on his lap … discovering his body. She had wanted to draw away but her fingers had remained. She remembered the throbbing underneath the sticky wool. It was like a magnet holding her hand.

The nipples of her breast became hard remembering his hand sliding underneath her dress. It was as if it was there now, all moist and warm on her naked flesh. And again the moon became a blur.

She had wanted him as badly as he had wanted her. Had wanted to throw her arms around him and draw him close … wanted to feel his kisses … his hands cupping her breasts.

I can't, she had thought miserably. What kind of a girl am I? I'm me, Joy Clay … I can't allow myself to do this … I can't. Her head had been enveloped in a fog. She had gotten dizzy, but not too much so. She had known she had to do something right away or …

"Don't Bob," she had said. "Let's don't … please."

"Please, Joy," he had whispered.

"No … no … Bob." He had caught her face in his hand and forced another kiss. His other hand held something warm against her leg. Joy had wrenched herself away from him.

"I'll stop," Blake had whispered helplessly after she had slapped him.

"I'd like to Bob … but I can't."

"I understand."

And now she wondered what would have happened if she had 73