Page:In defense of Harriet Shelley, and other essays.djvu/320

 MARK TWAIN

sity, is bilge -water; and where bilge-water is, only the dead can enjoy life. This is on account of the smell. In the presence of bilge -water, Limburger cheese becomes odorless and ashamed.

From these absolutely sure data we can com petently picture the daily life of the great discoverer. In the early morning he paid his devotions at the shrine of the Virgin. At eight bells he appeared on the poop-deck promenade. If the weather was chilly he came up clad from plumed helmet to spurred heel in magnificent plate armor inlaid with arabesques of gold, having previously warmed it at the galley fire. If the weather was warm he came up in the ordinary sailor toggery of the time great slouch hat of blue velvet with a flowing brush of snowy ostrich plumes, fastened on with a flashing cluster of diamonds and emeralds; gold-embroidered doublet of green velvet with slashed sleeves exposing under-sleeves of crimson satin; deep collar and cuff ruffles of rich limp lace; trunk hose of pink velvet, with big knee-knots of brocaded yellow ribbon ; pearl- tinted silk stockings, clocked and daintily em broidered; lemon-colored buskins of unborn kid, funnel-topped, and drooping low to expose the pretty stockings ; deep gauntlets of finest white heretic skin, from the factory of the Holy Inquisition, formerly part of the person of a lady of rank; rapier with sheath crusted with jewels, and hanging from a broad baldric upholstered with rubies and sapphires.

He walked the promenade thoughtfully, he noted the aspects of the sky and the course of the wind; he kept an eye out for drifting vegetation and other

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