Page:Honest debtor, or, The virtuous man struggling with, rising superior to, and overcoming misfortune (1).pdf/9

( 9 ) Her delicacy, though it gave her new charms, did not alter my conduct; and I anſwered, that it was on my own account that I complied with cuſtom; that what appeared as luxury to her, was nothing but a little more elegance than ordinary; that good taſte was never expenſive, and that whatever I might do, I ſhould never tranſgreſs the bounds of propriety. I deceived her. I deceived myſelf; or, rather, I baniſhed all reflection. I was ſenſible that I was living beyond my preſent income; but in a ſhort time the emoluments of my profeſſion would make good the deficiency; and, in the mean while, every one approved of my affectionate care to make my wife happy. Could I do leſs for her? Could I even do enough? This was the public voice. At leaſt it was the language of our friends. My father-in-law looked with concern upon theſe anticipated expences, upon this emulation of luxury, which ruins, ſaid he, the greateſt fortunes. He expreſſed his diſapprobation of it with ſome degree of ſeverity. I calmly anſwered, that this emulation ſhould never lead me into any indiſcretion, and be might ſafely depend upon my prudence. I have ſince learnt what an impreſſion this manner of reſpectfully evading his advice, made upon his mind, and what bitter reſentment it produced.

'The moment of my becoming a father drew nigh; but this moment, which promiſ-