Page:History of the wits jubilee, or, The chearful companion.pdf/18

( 18 ) At Derby aſſizes in 1788, a woman was convicted of ſtealing to the value of tenpence; the clerk of the aſſize callled out, "Mary Jones! you are found guilty of ſtealing value tenpence" "Very well" anſwered the priſoner (putting her hand in her pocket.)" Here take a ſhilling, give me tenpence."

At an entertainment given by the heads of a pariſh, where Mr Merryman was invited, the company, when the glaſs had gone round a little, began to ſing and be merry: when the clerk of the pariſh, who ſung very agreeably, was ſo conſcious ot his merit, that he began to grow very troubleſome, and would not ſuffer any gentleman to ſing except ſuch ſongs as he thought proper to call for. "Heyday, Mr Amen." ſays Merryman, “this is making too free metthinks; for though you make the company ſing what you pleaſe on Sundays, I can ſee no reaſon you ſhould oblige them to do ſo every day in the week."

An Oxford ſcholar being informed that a carrier, who ſtopped at the door,