Page:History of John Cheap, the Chapman (7).pdf/13

13 the breast then turns me over upon my back, and takes the pot himself. Ay, ay said the goodman, I think your brother pot-licker and you cannot agree about your breakfast. Well, said I, goodman, you said that pot-licking was a chapman's property, but your dog proves the contrary. So away I comes, and meeting the goodwife at the door, bid her farewell for ever; but what, said I, is your husband’s name? to which she answered, John Swine; I was thinking so, said I, he has such dirty fashions; but whether was yon his mother or his sister I lay with these two nights?

All that day I travelled the country west from Haddington, but could get no meat; when asked if they had any to sell, they told me they never did sell any bread, and I found by sad experience, they had none to give for nothing. I eamecame [sic] into a little country village, and went through it all, house after house, and could get neither bread nor ale to buy. At last I came into a poor weaver's house, and asked him if he would lend me a hammer; Yes, said he, what are you going to do with it? Indeed, said I, I am going to knock out all my teeth with it for I can get no bread to buy in all the country, for all the stores and stacks you have in it: What, said he, was you in the minister's? I know not, said I, does he keep an alehouse? O no, said he, he preaches every Sunday; and what does he preach? said I, is it to harden your hearts? haud well together? have no charity? hate strangers? hunger the poor? eat and drink all yourselves? better burst your bellies than give it to beggars, or let good meat spoil? If your minister be as naughty as his people, I'm positive he'll drive a louse to London for the hide and tallow. Here I bought the weaver’s dinner for twopence, and