Page:History of Buckhaven, or, The exploits of Wise Willie and Witty Eppie.pdf/10

10 Willie, for I have a muckle wame, an' I fear it's o'er true. O plague on you, Janet ! for ye're the father o‘t. Very soon after this Witty Eppie was sent for, as she was the howdy, and she fand a' Willie's wame to be sure about it. Indeed, co' Eppie, ye're the first man e'er I saw wi bairn before an how ye'll bear I dinna ken. Ye hae a wally wame, weel I wat, but how men bears bairns I dinna ken. But I would drink salt water and drown it in my guts: for if men get ance the gate o bearing wears themselves, they'll seek nae mair wives, So Willie drank sea water till his guts was like to rive, and out he got to ease himself in the kailyard. and with the terrible noise of his farting, up started a maukin behind him, whe thought it was shot; Willie seeing her jump o'rr the dyke, thought it was a chill brought forth, and cries out. Come back my dear, and be christened, and dinna rin to the hills to be a Pagan. So Willie grew better every day there- after, being brought to bed in the kail-yand, but his daughter was brought to bed some months after, which was the cause of the doctor's mistake.