Page:History and comical transactions of Lothian Tom (4).pdf/14

14 ed by the lowneſs of the price that the cow certainly bad ſome fault: Tom gives the Wife the other hearty bicker of ale, then ſays he, Wife, the money is yours, and the cow is mine, ye muſt tell me ony wee bits of fauts it ſhe has: Indeed, quo' the goodwife, ſhe has nae a faut but ane, and if ſhe wanted it, I wad never a parted wi' her: and what's that goodwife? ſaid he, Indeed, ſaid ſhe, the filthy daft beaſt ſucks ay herſel: hute, ſays Tom, if that be all, I'll ſoon cure her of that. O! can ye do'y ſaid ſhe, if I had kend what had a don't, ye wadna gotten her. A well, fays Tom, I'll tell you what to do, tak the cow's price I gave you juſt now, and tye it hard and faſt in your napkin, and give it to me through beneath the cow's wame, and I'll give you the napkin again over the cow's back, and I'll lay my life for it that ſhe'll never ſuck herſel in my aught; I wat well, ſaid ſhe, l'le do that an' there ſhou'd be witchcraft in't, ſo Tom no ſooner got it through below the cow's wame than he looſes out his money and puts it in his own pockets and gave the wife again her napkin over the cow's back, accordingly as he told her, ſaying, now Wife, you have your cow and I my money, and ſhe'll never ſuck herſelf in my aught, as I told you: O dole, cried the Wife, is that your cure, ye've cheated me, ye've cheated me.

OM being very ſcarce of money at a time when his rent was to pay, and tho' he was well acquainted with the butchers in Edinburgh, he tried ſeverals of them, yet none of them would lend him as much, he was known to be ſuch a noted ſharper, Tom thinks with himſelf, that he'll give them all a bite in general, who had refuſed him: So in he comes next day (and all of hem had heard of a fine fat calf he had feeding) comes to one of the butcher's and tells him he was going to ſell the fat calf he had at home. Well, ſaid the butcher, and what will you have for it? juſt five and thirty ſhil-