Page:Grinning made easy, or, Funny Dick's unrivalled collection of jests, jokes, bulls, epigrams &c. (1).pdf/20

 Jane Shore, having arrived at the conclusion of that affecting tragedy, where she says, ‘ Now I die ! I die !” falls down, nature being supposed entirely exhausted.—A sailor, perched on the front of the shilling gallery, forgetting that the distress of the actress was feigned roared out to the pit. Ho ! why don’t some of you lubbers in that there hold hand the poor woman a can of grog, since she is so badly ? ’

Dr Franklin, when last in England, used pleasantly to repeat an observation of his negro-servant, when the Doctor was making the tour of Derbyshire, Lancashire, &c. ‘ Every thing, Massa, work in this country ; water work ; wind work ; fire work ; smoke work ; dog work ; (he had noticed the last at Bath) man work ; bullock work ; horse work ; ass work; every thing work here but the hog; he eat, he drink, he sleep, he do nothing all day, he walk about like a gentleman !”

One of the people called Quakers, equally remarkable for his gallantry to the fair sex, as for his urbanity of manners, was one day walking in the streets of Edinburgh with a handsome young lady who remarked to him, that the heat of the day was oppressive; on which the Quaker recommended her to throw off a petticoat. The lady replied, Between you and I, friend G....s, I have but one on. And between thee and me, replied broadbrim, even that is one too many!