Page:Grinning made easy, or, Funny Dick's unrivalled collection of curious, comical, odd, droll, humorous, witty, whimsical, laughable, and eccentric jests, jokes, bulls, epigrams, &c..pdf/8

 The macer, with great coolness, answered, My Lord, they are all hissing.

Sir Boyle Roach, in one of the debates on the question of the Union, made a speech in favour of it, which he concluded by saying, that it would change the barren hills into fruitful vallies.

A man walking along after a woman, whose elegant shape excited his admiration, was not a little disappointed when he got up with her and saw her ordinary face—-If, Maddam, said he, you were as handsome before as you are behind, I would kiss you. You may, replied the lady, kiss where you think I am handsomest.

When Buchanan was tutor to James I. he found it necessary, one day, to give his most sacred Majesty a flogging. A lady of the court, being in the next room, and over- hearing what passed, ran in, and catching the young king in her arms, asked Buchanan how he could lift his hand against the Lord’s anointed; to which he replied, with great coolness, Madam, I have whipped his arse, you may kiss it if you please.

Alphonso, King of Arragon, to whom a Jew wished to sell a picture of our Saviour