Page:Georges Eekhoud - Escal Vigor, a novel.djvu/232

208 my own conscience. Strong in my absolute integrity, I revolted against the amorous disposition that prevails in the great majority. Reading further enlightened me as to the meaning and legitimacy of my inclinations. Artists, philosophers, heroes, kings, popes, even gods, justified and exalted by their example the cult of male beauty. In my reaction from doubt and remorse, I read again, to confirm my sexual faith and religion, the ardent sonnets of Shakespeare to William Herbert, Earl of Pembroke, and those no less idolatrous, of Michael Angelo to Tommoso di Cavalieri; I fortified myself by perusing passages from Montaigne, Tennyson, Wagner, Walt Whitman and Carpenter; I recalled to my mind the young people of the Banquet of Plato, the lovers of the Sacred Band of Thebes, Achilles and Patroclus, Damon and Pythias, Hadrian and Antinous, Chariton and Melanippe, Diocles, Cleomachus,—I shared in all these generous, virile passions of antiquity and of the Renascence, that they boast to us about in such a ridiculously pedantical way at college, while glozing over the superb eroticism, inspirer of purest art, doughtiest deeds, and loftiest patriotism.