Page:Fun upon fun, or, Leper the tailor (1).pdf/7

 if he would keep it a secret and learn him to find it out, he would give his mother a load of meal, to which Leper agreed; so he gave the poor supposed cuckold instructions how to behave. So home he goes and feigns himself very sick, and every day worse and worse, taking death to him; blesses his three small children, and charges his wife not to marry until his children could do something for themselves; this hypocritical woman takes a crying, 'Aha! marry,' she would never marry! 'no, no, there should never a man lie by my side, or kiss my lips after thee, my ain dear lamb, Johnny.' Then he acts the dead man as well as he possibly could, the neighbours were called in, and he's fairly o'erseen, as the old saying is, before good neighbours. The sorrowful widow made sad lament, wrung her hands and tore her hair. The reverent women about began to dress the corpse, asked her for a shirt. “Ay, ay,' said she, 'he has twa new linen sarks, and there is an auld ane in the bottom o' the kist, that naebody can wear; ony thing's good enough for the grave;' 'well,' said they, 'we must have some linen for a winding sheet;' 'aweel,' quo' she 'I ha'e twa cut o' linen i' the kist neuk, but there's a