Page:Fun upon fun, or, Leper the tailor (1).pdf/21

 cursing and swearing, and Leper crying after him, 'Sheep head barber.'

The barber resolved to be revenged on Leper, so when he was shaving Mess John, he tells him that Leper was the drunkenest fellow in the parish. So Mess John warns him to the session. Leper comes and says, What do want with me, Sir?' 'Come away, Leper,' says Mess John, 'I hear a bad report of you.' 'Me Sir, I am sure they were not my friends that told you that.' 'Indeed, I am informed you are a drunkard.' I a drunkard; you have not a soberer man in your parish. Stop, Sir, I will tell you now I lead my life:-In the morning, I cake a choppin of ale and a bit of bread, that I call my morning; for breakfast, I generally take a herring, and a choppin of ale, for I cannot sup brose like my lads; he herring makes me dry, so at eleven hours take a pint, and sometimes three choppins; at supper, I take a bit of bread and cheese and a pint, and so go to bed.' Mess John says, 'It's excessive drinking; I allow you one half of it for a quarter of a year.' Says Leper, 'I'll try it, Sir, and come back and tell you.' At the end of the quarter he draws out his account, and goes to Mess John, who was sitting with his elders in the