Page:Frank Stockton - Rudder Grange.djvu/68

Rh disagreeable trades people, none of the ordinary annoyances of housekeeping. Everything seemed to be done with a bell, a speaking-tube, or a crank.

"Indeed," said the ex-boarder, "if it were not for people tripping over the wires, I could rig up attachments by which I could sit in the parlour, and by using pedals and a key-board, I could do all the work of this house without getting out of my easy-chair."

One of the most peculiar features of the establishment was the servant's room. This was at the rear end of the floor, and as there was not much space left after the other rooms had been made, it was very small; so small, indeed, that it would accommodate only a very short bedstead. This made it necessary for our friends to consider the size of the servant when they engaged her.

"There were several excellent girls at the intelligence office where I called," said the ex-boarder; "but I measured them, and they were all too tall. So we had to take a short one, who is only so-so. There was one big Scotch girl who was the very person for us, and I would have taken her if my wife had not objected to my plan for her accommodation."

"What was that?" I asked.

"Well," said he, "I first thought of cutting a hole in the partition wall at the foot of the bed for her to put her feet through."

"Never!" said his wife emphatically. "I would never have allowed that."

"And then," continued he, "I thought of turning the bed around, and cutting a larger hole, through which she might have put her head into the little room on this side. A low table could have stood under the hole, and her head might have rested on a cushion on the table very comfortably."