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 do, and then do it yourself. Let me not be thought pedantic if I here set down ten rules for guests. The knowledge was painfully attained, and so is worthy of respect.

1. Make clear the date of your departure, diplomatically, but with promptitude. The most generous host would fain be sure his note has not been misunderstood.

2. Order the room assigned to you as if it were your own — or even more so. The servants have several other things to do.

3. Rise when you are called. Time waits for no man, and there is less reason why a hot oven should.

4. If you don’t see what you want, ask for it, for nothing flatters more the vanity of a host. But first be sure he has it in the house.

5. Laugh unaffectedly at his jokes. He does not tell them for the pleasure of perceiving that you have heard them before.

6. Praise the cooking while the waitress is in the room. Compared to her, Marconi is a novice in the transmission of news, and every cook is a friend worth having.